“Turn not away Thy face from Thy servant, for I am afflicted; hear me speedily: hearken unto my soul, and deliver it.” (Prokimenon of Forgiveness Vespers, Lenten Triodion pg 181).

This past Sunday, the last day before Great Lent, we celebrated “Forgiveness Sunday”. Several of us have written in the prior thread about our experiences at the special Vespers service last Sunday evening, particularly the often moving service of forgiveness that takes place at the end of Vespers.

The connection between forgiveness, fasting, repentance, etc., is a complicated one. I would like to offer for reflection a passage from a sermon by Fr. Alexander Schmemann on this topic.

“Conscience is that mysterious depth within our mind that brings remorse and passionate desire for cleansing, rebirth and correction. Remorse, precisely, is the voice of conscience, and it brings us to the first step on the road to cleansing, to the desire to forgive and be forgiven, to this very ‘forgiveness’ Sunday. Why? Why do forgiveness and the thirst for forgiveness enter us so clearly the moment our conscience is aroused, as its foremost demand? The answer is that conscience also reveals to us that the very essence of evil and falsehood is division, that is guilt before other human beings.

Dostoevsky said through the elder Zosima that ‘Each is guilty of everything before everyone’. At first glance these words seem not only grossly exaggerated, but simply absurd. … What is this guilt about? No, it’s not about particular offenses and quarrels, which are, I think, quite unavoidable. It’s not about trivial squabbles or petty irritations. No, this guilt which so suddenly and so obviously becomes apparent to me has its source elsewhere: in my own life, so throroughly permeated with self love. … Even our love is poisoned from within, mutiliated by ‘selfishness’, as if even in love we could possess the loved one for ourselves alone.

It is the conscience, only the conscience, which suddenly reveals to us with rutheless clarity the whole world as the struggle of everyone against everyone else, a struggle which consumes life from beginning to end. … We can begin then to hear as well the truth of other words said before Dostoevsky, by St. Seraphim of Sarov: ‘Save yourself, and thousands around you will be saved….’. Save yourself: but this means precisely to save yourself first of all from this primordial slavery to division, from this inner divorce from life and from people, from this conscious or unconscious state of struggle in which we live.”

During this First Week of Lent, let’s share with each other our own understandings and experiences of forgiveness, how forgiveness relates to Lent, and the meaning of forgiveness for ourselves spiritually. Let’s share our insights so that we can help each other grow closer to God and one another, overcoming the divisions, visible and invisible, that separate us.

In Christ,

Brendan

Dear in Christ,

May God Bless us all as we begin our journey of "Bright Sadness" of Great Lent, toward that "New and Glorious Dawn" of Pascha.

Too often, in the world today, so dominated by "feel-good" pop psychology we hear that we have to learn how to "forgive ourselves", so that we can get on with our lives. No. No. NO! That is certainly the way of Fallen Human Nature and exactly what the Evil One wants us to do. He says, " Go ahead, you made a mistake, but no on e really saw it. Don't get all bound up in your conscience, forgive yourself. Give yourself a break. God loves you and surely cannot mean to have you feel bad".

Think of the Sundays which led up to Great Lent. We saw a "righteous" man justifying himself, while a sinner wept and repented. We witnessed a boy become enthralled to the Evil One's world and then turn in sorrow and repentance seeking the forgiveness of his father. Then we were given a preview of what is in store for humankind in the Judgement. At each point we have seen an example of recognition of sin and the realization of how that sin separates us from our God. We saw each seeking the forgiveness of the Father, and not expecting everything to be as it was before, but "if only my Father would allow be to be His lowliest servant".

Forgiveness, does begin with the recognition of our sinful nature, our own sinful nature, not necessarily about what we may have done to others ( although that is very important too); but, we need to see how we are forging our chain , as Jacob Marley notes. We ought to know ourselves better than anyone, and we always really know when we have sinned. We cannot afford to just smile and "forgive" ourselves, "allow" ourselves or excuse ourselves. When we bow before one another at Vespers of Forgiveness Sunday ( for me this is this coming Sunday), we are not simply forgiving another person for what they may have said or done, but we are begging others to pray for our forgiveness, as well as their own. If we cannot see our sinful fallen nature and seek the healing balm of forgiveness, then we are enthralled in the realm of the world and will become numb to all our spiritual senses.

Great Lent is that opportunity for us all to seek that Repentance and ask for Forgiveness.

unworthy servant,

Father Kyrill

I travel a LOT for my job but I try to do what I can to observe the traditional fast (no meat, no dairy products, prayer) while I'm on the road.

Right now, I'm in Arizona, in a hotel. Lots of Mexican restaurants and fast food places-- none of which has a meatless/dairyless menu. Today I had coffee and two doughnuts (I'm training cops!), a pear and some wheat thins for lunch, and some rice cakes and an apple for dinner. I don't get to Church much--I'm oftentimes in an airplane. But I am doing what I can to observe the Preparation period for Pascha. It's a real challenge to feel that I'm doing what I need to to prepare for Pascha, but I feel that through the brief times I can devote to prayer, that is what is going to carry me through.

It's interesting to read our tradition and what we need to do, but in reality, it ain't easy to carry it out in my everyday world. Although McDonald's 'filet of fish' more or less accomplishes what the fast is all about, I'm afraid that my cholesterol level would go through the roof and I'd end up with a stroke or heart attack. And that is contrary to what the purpose of the fast is.

When I'm at home, I make a lot of meatless/dairyless meals, and try to get to Church. (I've got a great number of recipes; I'll post some as time goes on. Ah, what the heck, I'm Greek and we love food and run tons of restaurants: a can of corn (rinsed), a can of kidney beans (rinsed), a can of DelMonte chunked tomatoes; some chopped onion, some chopped garlic; parsley, oregano, olive oil and some lemon juice. Refrigerate and serve with a green salad, some bread, some white wine and some chilled fruit. Nutritionally complete. And remember, it's against the (canon) law to do harm to one's health while fasting.)

Blessings to all my brethren. I'll see y'all from Illinois/Chicago in 10 days, and then--ta-da!!-- Alaska.

Anybody else got some suggestions about what to make?