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Dec 29th, 2019
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A man gets a call from his doctor one day:
The doctor tells him, "I've got bad news and worse news for you, which do you want first?"
The man says, "Well, give me the bad news first."
The doctor says, "You have 24 hours to live."
"What's the worse news?" the man asks.
"I forgot to call you yesterday."
Courtesy of Larry the Cable Guy.
Last edited by Dr. Eric; 06/03/07 09:00 PM.
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Then there was the time the doctor told his patient "Sir, you are as sound as a dollar!"
The patient promptly had a heart attack and died.
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A woman takes her husband to a psychiatrist. "Doctor, my husband thinks he's a dog," she says.
"Let's get you on the couch sir and we'll talk," the doctor says. The man gets on the couch. "GET DOWN!!!" the wife yells! The psychiatrist looks perplexed.  "He's not allowed on the couch!" she explains.
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Doc, The first one was good, don't press your luck.   In IC XC, Father Anthony+
Everyone baptized into Christ should pass progressively through all the stages of Christ's own life, for in baptism he receives the power so to progress, and through the commandments he can discover and learn how to accomplish such progression. - Saint Gregory of Sinai
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What??? My patients love that last one!
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Yes, I agree w/Father Anthony...the first one was very good, the second-- not so good.
Alice
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So Larry the Cable Guy is funnier than John Houseman. 
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That about sums it up. You really need to explore more for your material. In IC XC, Father Anthony+
Everyone baptized into Christ should pass progressively through all the stages of Christ's own life, for in baptism he receives the power so to progress, and through the commandments he can discover and learn how to accomplish such progression. - Saint Gregory of Sinai
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I find the both jokes as odd.
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I find the both jokes as odd. It is probably a cultural thing. Different cultures have different humour.
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Patient: How much to have this tooth pulled?
Dentist: $90.00.
Patient: $90.00 for just a few minutes work???
Dentist: I can extract it very slowly if you like.
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Doc, Give it up before the AMA comes after you.  In IC XC, Father Anthony+
Everyone baptized into Christ should pass progressively through all the stages of Christ's own life, for in baptism he receives the power so to progress, and through the commandments he can discover and learn how to accomplish such progression. - Saint Gregory of Sinai
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Doctor: Nurse, how is that little boy doing, the one who swallowed ten quarters?
Nurse: No change yet.
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John Member
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Dr. Eric,
You do realize that should the AMA or ADA subpoena us looking for information about you we will have to provide them with all the information in our records, including the jokes you have posted?
Admin
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A SHORT HISTORY OF MEDICINE:
"Doctor, I have an ear ache."
2000 B.C. - "Here, eat this root."
1000 B.C. - "That root is heathen, say this prayer."
1850 A.D. - "That prayer is superstition, drink this potion."
1940 A.D. - "That potion is snake oil, swallow this pill."
1985 A.D. - "That pill is ineffective, take this antibiotic."
2000 A.D. - "That antibiotic is artificial. Here, eat this root!"
Monomakh
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