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#409257 11/08/14 03:24 PM
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Please say some prayers for me if you have the time. I'm so lost and lonely. Tomorrow is my birthday and nobody in my life cares. Not since I was 9. I am struggling with so much these past couple of years, and I'm having a really hard time finding strength lately. I just want to feel loved and taken care of. I feel like God has abandoned me and stopped hearing me.

megs927 #409258 11/08/14 04:10 PM
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Be assured of my poor prayers for you.
Regardless of how you feel, know in your heart that you are loved. God who is love, has created you in his image and likeness because he loves you with an unfathomable love. You would not exist if you were not loved.
May the love of God fill you with joy and peace. May you know his presence and delight in his love for you.
A very good way to experience the love of God is in feeding the hungry, visiting the sick, welcoming the stranger….
When you are feeling lost and lonely act with kindness towards others; find a shelter for the homeless or a soup kitchen in your area and volunteer.
May the Lord God remember you in his kingdom now, and forever and ever.

megs927 #409259 11/08/14 04:47 PM
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megs:

Be assured of my prayers for you. To echo Father Deacon, this might be your time to go in a new direction in your life and find family where you interact. Many times people find they are in relationships that are not supportive and find that there are others who are not related by blood who come to care deeply for them. Been there a few times in my own life.

Lord Jesus, in Your mercy, reach into the life of your handmaid and let her know of Your unfailing care for her. Amen.

Bob

Last edited by theophan; 11/08/14 04:48 PM.
megs927 #409263 11/08/14 11:09 PM
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Your experiences mirror mine in terms of feeling alone and unloved and abandoned even by God.

I went to a priest who was my teacher in high school and he took me next to the school chapel where we talked in a room. I told him, "Father, if I died tomorrow, nobody would care."

He began to talk to me, beginning by asking me, "Would your mother care if you died?" "Your father?" etc.

He then intertwined his words with quotes from the Gospel. As he spoke, my attention was suddenly taken by a light that seemed to appear near the wall opposite.

His words faded in the background slowly as this light became quite prominent and appeared to fill the room where we were sitting.

The light soon was very large, although no one turned on the room lights and I could still see that the room was, of itself, quite dark.

I turned to Father to see if he was seeing this light, but somehow I couldn't turn away from it too long. It was bright, warming and energizing.

As it overwhelmed me, I felt no more sorrow nor depression, but only a quiet inner joy and contentment as well as a release of nervous tension. Just wanted to be in this light.

As Father's words came to an end, it was time to get up and go. But the warmth of that light continued to make me happy and fulfilled. It was like being in a trance of sorts. Father smiled from ear to ear and said something I didn't really hear.

Have never forgotten that experience.

I ask God to grant you something similar in your life so you know by what great Love you are surrounded and that with that Love and Light, everything else isn't all that important.

Alex

megs927 #409265 11/08/14 11:56 PM
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Thank you, Alex, Deacon, and Bob. For your prayers, suggestions, words of support, and sharing your own experience. I really do wish I could have something life changing like that happen in my own case!

I wish I could volunteer like suggested, but my own health is currently not allowing me to do that or even work (I'm a nurse, so this is truly hard for me). Most days I can't even leave home right now. I'm trying so hard to find something new to do, but it's yet to be made clear or attainable with my current situation.

megs927 #409269 11/09/14 01:39 PM
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Dear Meg,

Perhaps it could your ill health itself that is causing this depression and despair? That is not unusual at all.

If you do not mind, maybe you can tell us a little bit about your illness, and not only can we pray for that as well, but you never know when someone will have some advice that might be an enlightenment from God in how to get better.

There have been health issues in my own life and my family's where an enlightenment of reading something or hearing something brought a way to get over or manage that particular health issue, and I have considered that nothing short of miraculous; just as miraculous as one who prays for a cure for a serious illness and is suddenly cured.

God reaches us through different channels. Stay positive and keep on praying.

Just today, in the Orthodox church, we celebrate the feastday of a very miraculous contemporary saint, Nektarios. Our priest had a little sermon about him and that he is a saint of healing, but especially of cancer. He said that in our very parish, he can witness to three cases of cancer in parishioners that were miraculously healed and disappeared completely!! Glory to God.

I can also attest to a healing of a young teenage girl in South Africa that I do not know. Her mother is Orthodox and posted a desperate plea for prayer to an Orthodox forum. Her cancer was serious. I quickly sent her a message about the saint and asked if she would like me to send her holy oil to annoint her with. She said yes, and I did.

On the very day that it arrived there, the girl was scheduled for a scan. She anointed her before the scan. The scan showed no trace of the cancer! Her mother was ecstatic at this miracle.

Glory to God and the intercessions of His saints!

Alice

megs927 #409270 11/09/14 03:00 PM
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Dear Friend in Christ,

If you can't move about, know that this is God's Will for you right now.

You can and should conduct your own ministry of prayer - the Jesus Prayer, the Psalms, whatever you have handy including your own prayers.

Pray for others, for others who are also suffering. God will warm your heart and will visit you with His Presence.

Just continue to pray. "Pray and worry about nothing" for God will cover you with His protection and will be with you as you experience the Cross now.

Think about the Wounds of Christ on the Cross - and your soul will be assuaged!

There is nothing more powerful than to pray the psalms etc. for the salvation and peace of the world!

God has granted you that mission now.

Alex

Orthodox Catholic #409278 11/10/14 12:44 AM
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Dear Nurse Meg (if that is OK to call you).

As you see, there are so many people here who love you! We would all love to give you a great big cyber-group hug, if we could!

Please accept our spiritual group hug - you are not alone.

XXX

Alex

megs927 #409287 11/10/14 03:46 PM
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Thank you so much for taking time to respond. I sent you a message with the details you requested, Alice.

megs927 #409289 11/10/14 04:03 PM
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Dearest Meg-

I know intimately the tremendous pain loneliness can bring. I feel such sorrow for you now and wish in some way I could lift this hurt you are experiencing. Please know that I am praying for you and asking our Almighty, Omnipotent God to send an angel to you to touch and assuage this pain you feel. Please know that you are not alone and that you are truly loved!

TheLeastofThese #409296 11/10/14 11:27 PM
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Besides, nurses are much more important than even doctors!

Nurses have saved my life on more than one occasion in hospital as they understand what one is going through.

Forced to sleep on a hospital bed in the corridor (which meant the bright lights were on in my face all night) it was a kindly nurse that brought me pillows and everything else required to turn the experience into a bearable misery.

And never let a doctor try to get blood out of your arm! You will be black and blue for two weeks afterwards!

God bless you, Meg!

Alex

megs927 #409323 11/12/14 12:41 AM
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Thank you, TheLeast, for your prayers. I'm so sorry to hear you know how this cam feel. I really hope that all these prayers receive an answer. Things became once again worse last night.

Alex, thanks for your appreciation for nurses. Not everyone has that! I can't imagine doing anything else for a living.

megs927 #409358 11/14/14 11:46 AM
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May God bless you! In my simple experience, I find that embracing the cross we must bear makes it all "bearable."

Even when there is pain and suffering involved, we should do an "hourly office" of psalms (three, seven, ten or twelve) with a brief reading from the Gospels and anything else we would like to add - at the turn of every hour.

When we don't feel like praying, such a framework (which the desert saints practiced) brings us into real communion with God.

Come back here often - this is a community that loves you and wants to support you!

Alex

megs927 #409481 11/19/14 12:21 AM
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Thank you for the kind words. Things continue to be stressful, but I'm praying and reading psalms and gospels whenever I have the time. Hoping to be granted a job I interviewed for today that I could do regardless of my health with my degree.

megs927 #409499 11/20/14 10:17 AM
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May God bless you and protect you always!!

Alex

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