www.byzcath.org Forums Faith & Christian Life Faith & Theology Elements of a good prayer life

Dear Friends,

My (New Calendar) New Year's resolution is to revamp my prayer life.

What are some absolute essential elements to a well-rounded prayer life?

Alex

Simplicity. The simpler the structure of one�s daily prayers the easier it is to keep over the long run.

Dear Administrator,

Happy New Year, Sir!

O.K., I'll admit that simplicity is not my strong suit.

And yet, I want to feel, at the end of the day, that I've communed with God closely and intimately.

What would you suggest to someone like me who works with politicians and therefore is often on the horns of a dilemma - in more ways than one?

Alex - who now uses his orange scarf as a prayer shawl

Personally I think the greatest attribute of prayer is consistency. Just as with the body, without feeding the soul, it withers.

Without vigil, and the spiritual repairing of the "brick and mortar" of the soul, decay sets in, passions arise, become stronger and more disordered.

One little Hour a day, small Compline, one Akathist or Canon, morning and evening prayers, Jesus Prayer, Rule of St. Seraphim, whatever, just be consistent and start out with one or two daily offerings only until that work pf prayer becomes part of daily life, and work from there.

If I may add, in my struggle to become a being of prayer, I would have to say attention is very important. A few prayers well said so that the words take root in me and I acquire their sentiments while allowing them to transform me is much better than....saying many prayers with my mind wandering aimlessly filled with distractions and wanting to finish just so that I can know that I accomplished my prayer rule at the end of the day.
.....that's my humble thoughts.
Peace to all,
Marie

There is not a single formula that applies to everyone. It�s just that the more complex one�s prayer rule the less likely one is to keep it over time.

Recommendations should really come from a spiritual father or mother. But since you asked me, I often recommend to those who ask a combination of the Psalms and the Jesus Prayer.

Morning Prayer can be as simple as the Lord�s Prayer, Psalm 50 (51) and the Jesus Prayer (150 repetitions). [Or even just one of these to start.]

Evening Prayer, likewise, can be as simple as the Lord�s Prayer, Psalm 140 (141) and the Jesus Prayer (150 repetitions).

Once those customs are established one can add a reading of Gospel appointed for the day (or, to keep things simple, the Gospels in order). As time permits and if the prayer rule is being kept, to this one can add additional psalms (either in any order or according to the kathisma rules).

During the day you can prayer either the Jesus Prayer or the Rosary (which I know you love). You don�t need to have the beads handy. Each time you get up from your desk you can start praying until you get wherever you are going. Eventually this will become automatic. You�ll know that your doing OK when you are halfway to somewhere and find your in the middle of a prayer.

The Complines, Akathists, Canons and etc. recommended by Diak can be good supplements, so long as you don�t violate the rule of simplicity (simplicity = consistency for most people). Let�s say you start by setting aside 15 minutes of prayer in both the morning and again in the evening. If you are still easily keeping the prayer rule after a few months you might begin to treat yourself to an extra half hour one day a week and pray one of these.

Dear Administrator,

Just a note of thanks for that post 'from the heart' above!

It obviously comes from someone with experience (you are better than the spiritual fathers I've had, I'm afraid to say . . . or actually, I'm not afraid to say . . .).

What speaks to me is the balance implicit in your recommendation that includes the psalms and a repetitive/meditative prayer like the Jesus Prayer and the Rosary.

I've also found that praying the psalms in the Alexandrian/Pachomian way, 12 at a time, is helpful in keeping my focus straight through.

As always, you are the cat's meow!

Alex

Oy vey,Alex needs suggestions ?

My rule of prayer morning/evening :

Liturgy of Hours psalms+canticles+readings(though I dislike the Grail Psalter(ICEL version), I'll use the Sixto-Clementine(Greek/Latin/English) translation,Pius XII Psalter(Hebrew/Latin/English version)from the Bible itself, I like to study the psalms and texts as I use and pray them.

I finish with the Byzantine Book of Prayers with my adaptation of the Melkite intercessory prayers.
I find that this little prayer book fits 80% of my needs.

Of course I do agree with the Admin., gotta keep it simple, some days I over tax my self and lose the true substance of what I'm doing,the salt losing its saltiness.

james

Alex,

Twelve psalms at a time sounds nice but that may be too many to start with. Concentrate more on the length of time in prayer rather then the amount of prayers said. Don�t be concerned about the feeling of needing to �focus�. If you�re describing what I think you are describing, it doesn�t come with the quantity of prayer or the length of time spent in prayer. It comes with consistency in prayer over a long period. [But keep in mind that we are to have no expectations in prayer.]

Do you remember the hand water pumps that they used to have at parks and sometimes at country homes? If the well had not been used in awhile no water would come out when you started pumping. Pumping it faster didn�t help. To get water from the well one needed to pump the well consistently. Eventually the water would start flowing. Once the water started flowing it kept flowing as long as you returned to the well often enough to keep the pump primed. But if you didn�t return to the well often enough the well lost its prime and you needed to start over again. It has been my experience that one�s prayer life is very similar.

Admin

PS: See: A Morning Rule of Prayer (it's formated for printing).

Many of the older men in our church do regular exercising. Want to know how much time they spend?

They will tell you by how many Psalms they prayed as they were doing their regular workout. It isn't the time that they spend doing the exercises, it is how much they prayed that is important to them.

I have been struggling with prayer too. However, for the first time I think I made a MAJOR examination of my conscienous. AND WOW! I can't begin to explain how the Divine Liturgy, God's Word, Prayer is all changing. Yeah, I had done it many times before but this was different.

So I think one of the tricks (if you want to call it that) is a very good confession. Taking advantage of the Sacrament of Confession more often is a must.

Also, it is confession of our words. It is so imperitive as Christians that we bring our words into line with God's Word.

Let me use this as an example. In Romans 4, God changed Abrams name to Abraham. Every time he said "I am Abraham", he was saying "I am the Father of Nations". Now Alex, every time you have said I am Alex, you have litterly said, "I am the protector of mankind," what your name means. And quite literaly that is what you do, at least from what I have read from your writings.

See God cared enough about what we are to do in life that he went before we were born and guided our parents into naming us.

What I am trying to say is the more we bring ourselves into agreement with God's Word, the easier prayer, Bible study, our whole world becomes.

Pani Rose

This is a wonderful New Year's topic!!

I've had the same desire to have a more consistent, fruitful prayer life. On another thread about prayer the Administrator recommended the simplicity of beginning with the morning prayer and that's what I've been doing...consistently.I also sit a few minutes to make myself receptive and open to God.

Throughout the day I try to reflect on my thoughts and actions and if they're off (which is pretty often) I pray to be shown how to do better.(Pani Rose, I've also found that this practice enriches my prayer life.)

It is also necessary to bless those who annoy me as quickly as possible for peace of mind. When the temptation to get angry, think badly of others,gossip, etc. is,well,tempting the Jesus Prayer keeps me from falling.Of course, I don't always remember to do these things .
Thank you all for your suggestions.

Peace

PS Years ago I found that when I was out walking during cold winters concentrating on prayers took my mind off the cold.

Dear Alex,

Glory to Jesus Christ!

I am reminded of wonderful thoughts on prayer from an earlier post of Father Archimandrite Gregory. With what I hope is his kind permission, I re-post his conclusion:

Deacon El
-------------------------------------------

"So, the essence of the prayer consists in attentively addressing God and appealing to Him with a warm heartfelt feeling �whether you are expressing your gratitude, repentance or something else in your prayer. If there is no such feeling, then there is no real prayer.

In order to learn praying, pray more often and with more zeal and you will learn it: you would not need anything else. If you work hard and patiently, you will acquire the skill of unceasing prayer with time. Make it your goal � to seek and do seek. The Lord is close to you. Keep God always in your mind and always try to see the Lord before you and to venerate Him.

When interfering thoughts come to your mind during praying � drive them away, if they persist � banish them again...and be that way in everything. This is a deed of sobriety. Exert yourself to keep your heart in a religious spirit. When your heart is overcome with a feeling, vain thoughts do not bother it.

We began writing with the effort to write and the wish to do the work properly. In the same way we have to learn praying through effort and persistence. A prayer will not come by itself, you have to learn it like rubbing your soul would warm it up. When the warmth comes, your thoughts would calm down, and your prayer will become cleansed. Everything comes through God�s grace. That is why we have to pray to the Lord for Him to grant us the prayer.

As far as the praying rule is concerned, you can choose any of them as long as you are keeping your soul in reverence to God.

It would be good to get used to appeal to God with short prayers during the day. The main prayer out of all of them is the Jesus prayer, "Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me a sinner." Learn 24 prayers of John Chrysostom and pray to God with them. Using short prayers concentrates your attention and reviews all your spiritual needs.

Do not forget that the strength of the prayer is the "contrite spirit," that is the state when your heart is filled with repentance and humbleness. Commend yourselves into the hands of God and He would never leave you. While praying you should not try to visualize God or Theotokos, or the saints, or angels, or any other visions, but just pray being sure that God and the saints hear your prayer. How can they hear it? � What use in discussing that? They just hear it � that�s all. If you start creating various images in your mind, there appears the danger of praying to some fantasy. How can we visualize something that we have never seen? And also the state in which the saints find themselves in that other world is so different from anything familiar to us that all our visualizations are doomed to turn out fraudulent and false. That is why we should get accustomed to saying a prayer without creating any images in our minds.

That this may help all of us to pray better and with attention!"

Abba Macarius was asked, 'How should one pray?' The old man said, 'There is no need at all to make long discourses, it is enough to stretch out one's hands and say, "Lord, as You will, and as You know, have mercy." And if the conflict grows fiercer say, "Lord, help!" He knows very well what we need and He shows us His mercy.'

Sayings of the Dessert Fathers

In His Holy Name,
+Fr. Gregory

Dear Friends,

Thank you all for sharing such deeply spiritual thoughts!

I am already making use of them!

(Just so you don't think you are talking to the wind here ).

And, Pani Rose, you are right, "Alexander" means "helper/protector of humankind."

For that reason alone, I think that name is, well, "great."

Alex

Dear Alex,

Great resolution. My wife and I made a similar one, which raises the point that if your wife is so inclined to be a "helpmate" in this instance, then the both of you can help each other and hold each other (in that popular modern word) "accountable."

Consistency, simplicity, patience: I have none of these, but everything I've seen and read suggests they are key, as others on here, wiser and holier than I, have already suggested.

Then there are two beautiful prayers I just found in the past few weeks.

The first, from St. John of Kronstadt:

O all-merciful Lord!
Grant me the divine gift of holy prayer, flowing from the depth of my heart.
Gather together the dispersed thoughts of my mind, that it may always strive toward its Creator and Saviour.
Destroy the burning arrows of the evil one, which tear me away from Thee.
Quench the flame of the passionate thoughts that devour me during prayer.
Cover me with the grace of Thy most Holy Spirit, that to the very end of my sinful life I may love Thee alone with all my heart, all my soul and mind, and all my strength, and in the hour when my soul takes leave of my mortal body, O Sweetest Jesus, take into Thy hands my spirit when Thou comest into Thy Kingdom.

The other one is from the Venerable John Henry Newman:

My God, how far I am from acting according to what I know so well! I confess it: my heart goes after shadows. I love anything better than communion with Thee. I am ever eager to get away from Thee. Often I find it difficult even to say my prayes. There is hardly any amusement I would not rather take up than set myself to think of Thee. Give me grace, O my Father, to be utterly ashamed of my own reluctance! Rouse me from sloth and coldness, and make me desire Thee with my whole heart. Teach me to love meditation, sacred reading, and prayer. Teach me to love that which must engage my mind for all eternity.